"Effing and Blinding" - A thought

There’s a moment immortalised in the film The Great Escape when two of the escapees, about to board a train on the way out of Germany, have their kennkarte checked by a Gestapo officer. Just as their documents are given the all clear and they board the train the Gestapo officer adds in English, “good luck” to which one of the Englishman automatically replies, “oh, thank you!” They are both immediately arrested and we all know what happened next.

From my two and a half months here I can well believe this mistake – after all the escapees’ hard work and planning – is true. It’s only when you are taken out of the society in which you’ve lived for so long that you understand how ingrained verbal reflexes can become, in the same way automatic reflexive behaviour requires no effort or consideration.

Take brushing your teeth for example. Most of us do this unconsciously, yet it was by definition at some stage a conscious and deliberate act. Or take thanking a shopkeeper when you’ve paid for your goods and are leaving – we do this without pausing to consider the meaning of the sentence. These same verbal reflexes have - for me anyway - translated into my Polish speaking. So I will apologise profusely when I don’t have the correct change, whereas a Pole won’t. I’ll say the words, “ thank you” repeatedly at every stage of a transaction rather than at the end as Poles do. That’s not to say they are impolite, they just don’t use the words “thank you” or “cheers” as often or at the same stage as we English do.

But this transferability of automatic language use doesn’t seem to extend to swearing. I have to consciously swear in Polish (which can be very satisfying) but if someone knocks my bad knee on the bus or if I slip and nearly fall in snow or sludge, before I’ve consciously checked my balance or given a reproachful stare, or even registered what’s happened, the word “f**k” seems to (silently) come out of my mouth. Maybe this is just a sign of my poor manners! Some say that you’re not really ‘living’ a language until you dream in it. I suggest an alternative test: just jump on someone’s toes... you should be able to find out what their native language is easily enough.

PS I see that following my recent blog post on Polish football talent, Arsene Wenger has tonight decided to start with Szczesny in goal - a huge night for the young Polish lad. Arsene, I am available for hire! Call me!